By Amy Sorensen Kulesa
In both the Hebrew and Christian scriptures, Divine encounters often begin with the utterance “Be not afraid” on the part of an angel of the Lord or by Jesus, Himself. This clues us in to an area of our hearts of which Heaven seems to be well-aware — that as human beings, we are well-acquainted with fear in our journey of life. I wonder whether we are as aware of this ever-present dynamic within us, or if we live much of our lives surrounding our hearts with self-protective barricades against the encroachment of fear — fears with many names and of many varieties. Seen in this light, it might be said that the movement from fear into trustful love is the essential pilgrimage of the spiritual life, no matter what religion or culture.
Henri Nouwen named our central, core fear as that of not being the beloved, of not belonging in a heart-sense to the House of Love within ourselves and relationally with others. He struggled with this himself, which made him an eminently gentle and vulnerable voice to express the dimensions of this fear — and the healing of this fear — to the rest of us. Though the bonds of human relationship and our own self-esteem can be fragile, Nouwen guides us to recognize the beckoning, loving presence of the Divine origin of our heart’s desire, depicted by Jesus in His parable of the Prodigal Son and Forgiving Father. It may take a lifetime to soften the human heart back into the tenderness of trustful childhood, but we are encouraged by Jesus that in this journey, He will never leave us nor forsake us and that He will be with us always. Perhaps it is not as much a matter of moving from a place of not-belonging to one of belonging, as of awakening to the realization that we have always been held in love.
To hear more from Amy, consider registering for Entering the House of Love Retreat from Friday, February 27 at 4:00pm through Sunday, March 1 at 1:00pm.
Amy Sorensen Kulesa, OFS, MDiv, MSW is a spiritual director, retreat leader and certified Introspective Breathwork™ facilitator. She earned a Master of Divinity from Princeton Theological Seminary and a Master of Social Work from Rutgers University. She is a graduate of the Epiphany Academy of Formative Spirituality, the Bon Secours Spiritual Direction Institute, and One Breath Institute. Immersed in both the Bon Secours and Franciscan charisms, Amy enjoys facilitating retreats in which participants have the opportunity to discern the narrative of their own lives within the larger story of God’s abundant healing, grace, and mercy.